May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer ~ Psalm 19:14
In the book of Proverbs we have a very stark statement as to what God hates. So let us take a look…
1. Haughty eyes: Haughty eyes deals with pride and God hates pride. The eyes are the windows into pride. The phrase, “That person looks down on me!” That’s the haughty eye and its full of pride. Pride is the original sin that goes all the way back to the Garden of Eden. Man wanted to be like God (notice the pride) more than he wanted to be with God. He looked down on God.
2. A lying tongue: A lying tongue is a reminder that all words count. All words have consequences and that all our words will be judged by God. This is why in Proverbs 18:21 we are warned: life and death are in the power of the tongue. When we lie, we trample on the greatness and dignity that God has placed in all humans.
3. Hands that shed innocent blood: Innocence does not imply sinlessness. But to shed innocent blood is to take the life of one who has done nothing worthy of death. God loves and wants us to protect the innocent.
4. A heart that devises wicked schemes: Throughout Scripture, God reminds us that He alone searches the heart. God knows what we think and he sees the plans and purposes that are conceived in the souls of all people.
5. Feet that are quick to rush into evil: To rush into evil is to demonstrate a great delight and enjoyment of evil and an eagerness to participate in it. God hates the enjoyment of evil. A lot of people like to witness evil and yet they would never think of doing it themselves. God says no.
6. A false witness who pours out lies: This deals with perjury. But when the Proverbs writes about a false witness, the principle is so much deeper than the mere avoidance of lying. This is talking about making right confession. The word confession is a word that literally means to speak truth that is revealed by God.
7. A person who stirs up conflict in the community: The climax of wickedness is the one who purposefully causes division. It is the kind of conflict that is done in secret and done by one who won’t appeal through proper channels and who does not submit to proper authority. It is someone who stirs up conflict for the sole purpose of stirring up conflict.
Now, if God hates these things in this passage (and He does!), then it stands to reason He loves just the opposite. In other words, if God hates haughty eyes that means He loves the eyes of humility. If God hates a lying tongue what does He love? A tongue of integrity. If God hates those who shed innocent blood, He loves those who defend the innocent. If He hates the heart that devises wicked schemes, how much more does He love the one who works towards virtue? If God hates feet that rush to evil, how much does He love feet that run towards goodness? If He hates a false witness, He must love a true witness! If He hates those who sow discord, how much more does He love those who sow unity and peace? At the end of the day, the Proverbs writer is asking us to consider: What kind of people are we striving to be? May we strive to be those who practice what God loves!
——————
***By Dr Dave Lescalleet at Pruit Cares Foundation
“There’s something valuable about remembering death, and thinking about it. When we think forward it urges us on to live a worthwhile life now. And when I stand before God, I’ll definitely at that time be thinking about how I wish I had lived. But the wise ones are the ones who consider that question now, and not just consider that question, but they do something about it”
“When I come to die (or the Lord returns first), will I say, “I wish I could have showed the Lord more how much He means to me.”
“One of my goals in this life is to gain the continual habit of gently turning my attention away from distraction and back to the Lord and His presence, throughout every day.”
“Our disposable life can be a cup full of devotion to Christ – devotion means : Christ is EVERYTHING to me. The disposable cup full of Christlikeness to live here and please the Lord not just outwardly, but inwardly from the heart with pure love and intentions flowing out of us. The disposable cup full of humility which lifts the Father and Jesus up, and is happy to go down and decrease because He is increasing. The disposable cup full of trust and faith which bows before God’s wisdom and love, in the midst of great pain and years of suffering – contently committing ourself to the Lord’s hand through it all to do as He will”
Full Article
One of the most challenging things Paul said was in Acts 20:24“I consider my life worth nothing to me…” (NIV). I read mainly the NASB translation of the Bible today, but I learned this verse in the NIV and as a teenager I was so challenged by what Paul said there. What a challenge Paul gave us in his example.
We can tell a lot about ourself by what pops up in our phone apps and on our computers, in our web browsers – Recommended videos, and ads, etc. Companies spend billions to track our behavior and recommend us content they think we will consume. So in a sense I suppose at least some of what comes back to me is a reflection of myself – and my interests.
But I was surprised the other day that Youtube recommended me a really random video, I have no idea why. The video was a live stream of a memorial of a random lady who had recently passed away a day or two earlier. This was not a famous lady – it was an older woman who lived in the U.S. somewhere, and the funeral home where her service was had a Youtube channel which livestreamed the services. And for reasons unknown to me, it popped up in my recommended videos.
At first I was confused and ignored it, but then I was reminded of Ecclesiastes 7:2 : “It is better to go to a house of mourning Than to go to a house of feasting, Because that is the end of every man, And the living takes it to heart.” So I clicked on it and started watching.
There’s something valuable about remembering death, and thinking about it. When we think forward it urges us on to live a worthwhile life now. And when I stand before God, I’ll definitely at that time be thinking about how I wish I had lived. But the wise ones are the ones who consider that question now, and not just consider that question, but they do something about it (see the parable of the wise and foolish virgins in Matthew 25).
So I clicked on that live stream (which had been going on for a little while already – so I scanned through it), and I watched family members talk of this womans life – the challenges she went through, losing a husband who died somehow when the kids were young. Trying to raise her daughters in the right way, and be there as a support to her grandkids in the midst of everything.
But the thing that touched me most is what her granddaughter said. She said weeping, “I wish I could have told you more how much you mean to me.” And I thought of people that have passed away in my life, and how we definitely often have that thought: “If only I had one more day…”
But then I realized something even more important on the exact same lines, but not toward loved ones. Toward God: we have JUST this one life to show God how much He means to us.
And here’s the question: When I come to die (or the Lord returns first), will I say, “I wish I could have showed the Lord more how much He means to me.”
And it flips my perspective on everything when I think like that. How much more I wish I would have strove against sin harder in my inner life, to spend plain and simple time with Him – not with masterful professional prayers but just 2 friends alone with each other – Jesus and I. To love Jesus by loving others and showing them mercy and encouragement, to be content in all trials and suffering for His sake, to praise Him in them. To labor WITH God for salvation of others by praying for them and never giving up, to seek His presence always, and treasure Him above all. To despise the things of earth, and to consider everything of earth rubbish for His sake – to know Him and to please Him.
What a chance we have now. But we only have it now. 2 Cor 6:2 “… Behold, now is “THE ACCEPTABLE TIME,” behold, now is “THE DAY OF SALVATION”
I’ve heard it said, “A man is what the thinks about all day.” One of my goals in this life is to gain the continual habit of gently turning my attention away from distraction and back to the Lord and His presence, throughout every day. Not to fix my gaze on ‘other cares’. It’s not easy. I don’t think many Christians ever attain that type of closeness with the Lord. But the Lord put in my heart the desire for that life, and I believe that this is the way to keep doing everything for the love and glory of God (1 Cor 10:31) – to carry my cross with Jesus in my sights (Heb 12:2) and in my heart. Otherwise it’s like a wife who cooks and cleans the home, and doesn’t leave – but has no desire for her husband, no intention to love and be with him. It can be lifeless. I have to keep the Father and Jesus in my heart in the midst of all of this. I need the right life WITH the right motive.
The Lord gave me a picture one time: I like to drink coffee in disposable cups. I enjoy the coffee. But the cup is basically value-less except for what it holds for a temporary time. I throw it out after. And I saw – that is EXACTLY what our life is: Disposable. That’s what Paul said “my life is worth nothing to me.. if only I may finish my course” (Acts 20:24). The only value this life holds is what it can contain of Jesus in this passing moment that we are here. It’s disposable. It’s a disposable life – but can be full of treasure while it is here for a little time, before it’s thrown out.
Our disposable life can be a cup full of devotion to Christ – devotion means : Christ is EVERYTHING to me. That devotion is the valuable thing this disposable life can hold for a time. The disposable cup full of Christlikeness to live here and please the Lord not just outwardly, but inwardly from the heart with pure love and intentions flowing out of us The disposable cup full of humility which lifts the Father and Jesus up, and is happy to go down and decrease because He is increasing The disposable cup full of trust and faith which bows before God’s wisdom and love, in the midst of great pain and years of suffering – contently committing ourself to the Lord’s hand through it all to do as He will
This is the eternal value which our disposable cup can hold for some time until we take it into eternity.
James 4:14 “…You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away.”
And it is spiritually very helpful – thinking about the future and our end (even in the form of watching Youtube memorials of strangers!) – to meditate on: what will matter 1000 years from now? Or even 100 years from now? This helped me early on in my Christian life. And I’m working to try to teach my kids about this today.
Here’s a poem which also challenged me when I was younger and I heard it – to live more seriously for God now, and to fix my mind on things above (Colossians 3:2):
100 YEARS FROM NOW It will not make much difference, friend, A hundred years from now, If you live in a stately mansion Or on a floating river scow; If the clothes you wear are tailor-made Or pieced together somehow, If you eat big steaks or beans and cake A hundred years from now.
It won’t matter about your bank account Or the make of car you drive, For the grave will claim your riches and fame And the things for which you strive. There’s a deadline we all must meet And no one will turn up late, It won’t matter then all the places you’ve been, Each one will keep that date.
We will only have in eternity What we gave away on earth, When we go to the grave we can only save The things of eternal worth, What matters, friend, the earthly gain For which some men always bow? For your destiny will be sealed, you see A hundred years from now.
Sadly there are many false believers who will be expecting to go to Heaven and will be denied entrance. The best way to avoid being one is to make sure you have truly put your trust in Christ alone for salvation.
When you have repented and put your faith in Christ that will lead to a change of life. Follow God and educate yourself with his Word.
Many people follow false teachings from the Bible given by false preachers or they just refuse to obey instructions from God and follow their own minds.
There are many people who throw on the Christian name tag and think by just going to church they will be granted Heaven, which is false. You know there are people like that in your church and especially in the youth today.
You know there are people still having sex outside of marriage, still going to clubs, they still have a continuous willful potty mouth. Hell will be worse for these people than atheists. They are just Sunday Christians and they don’t care about Christ. Am I saying that a Christian is perfect? No. Can a Christian backslide? Yes, but there will be growth and maturity in a true believers life because it is God working in them. They won’t just remain in darkness if they are the Lord’s sheep because God will discipline them and also His sheep hear His voice.
Fake Christians quotes
Laurence J Peter – “Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to the garage makes you a car.”
“Don’t let your lips and your lives preach two different messages.”
“Your most powerful testimony is how you treat others after the church service is over.”
“What a heartbreak it would be to live an “almost” Christian life, then “almost” get into heaven.”
Beware, there are many fake Christians
1. Matthew 15:8 These people honour me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.
2. Isaiah 29:13 And so the Lord says, “These people say they are mine. They honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. And their worship of me is nothing but man-made rules learned by rote.
3. James 1:26 If a person thinks that he is religious but can’t control his tongue, he is fooling himself. That person’s religion is worthless.
4 1 John 2:9 Those who say that they are in the light but hate other believers are still in the dark.
5. Titus 1:16 They claim to know God, but they deny him by what they do. They are detestable, disobedient, and unfit to do anything good.
Fake Christians don’t care about God’s Word
Fake Christians sin on purpose saying, “I’ll just repent later” and disobey God’s teachings. Even though we are all sinners and we still struggle with sin, Christians don’t live a lifestyle of willfully and deliberately sin.
6. 1 John 2:4 Whoever says, “I know him,” but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in that person.
7. 1 John 3:6 Those who live in Christ don’t go on sinning. Those who go on sinning haven’t seen or known Christ.
8. 1 John 3:8-10 The person who practices sin belongs to the evil one, because the Devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason that the Son of God was revealed was to destroy what the Devil has been doing. No one who has been born from God practices sin, because God’s seed abides in him. Indeed, he cannot go on sinning, because he has been born from God. This is how God’s children and the Devil’s children are distinguished. No person who fails to practice righteousness and to love his brother is from God.
9. 3 John 1:11 Dear friend, do not imitate what is evil but what is good. Anyone who does what is good is from God. Anyone who does what is evil has not seen God.
10. Luke 6:46 Why do you call me Lord but don’t do what I tell you?
Fake Christians think that there is another way to get into heaven besides Jesus.
11. John 14:6 Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”
True Christians love Jesus and have new desires and affection for Him.
12. John 14:23-24 Jesus replied, “Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching. My Father will love them, and we will come to them and make our home with them. Whoever does not love me does not keep my words. And the word that you hear is not mine but the Father’s who sent me.”
13. 1 John 2:3 We know that we have come to know him if we keep his commands.
14. 2 Corinthians 5:17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.
Fake Christians are hypocrites
Even though the Bible says we are to lovingly, kindly, and gently go to our brothers and sisters alone to correct them of their sins, how can you do that, but you’re doing the same thing as them just as much or even more than them? People who do things for show such as give to the poor and other acts of kindness to be seen by others are also hypocrites.
15. Matthew 7:3-5 Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.
16. Matthew 6:1-2 Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven. Thus, when you give to the needy, sound no trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be praised by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward.
17. Matthew 12:34 You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.
18. Matthew 7:21-23 “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’
19. 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.
20. Revelation 22:15 Outside are the dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves and practices falsehood.
Fake Christians are false preachers and false prophets just like the cast of Preachers of LA.
21. 2 Corinthians 11:13-15 For such men are false apostles, deceitful workmen, disguising themselves as apostles of Christ. And no wonder, for even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light. So it is no surprise if his servants, also, disguise themselves as servants of righteousness. Their end will correspond to their deeds.
22. Jude 1:4 For certain people have crept in unnoticed who long ago were designated for this condemnation, ungodly people, who pervert the grace of our God into sensuality and deny our only Master and Lord, Jesus Christ.
23. 2 Peter 2:1 But there were false prophets also among the people, even as there shall be false teachers among you, who privily shall bring in damnable heresies, even denying the Lord that bought them, and bring upon themselves swift destruction.
24. Romans 16:18 For they that are such serve not our Lord Jesus Christ, but their own belly; and by good words and fair speeches deceive the hearts of the simple.
Reminders
25. 2 Timothy 4:3-4 For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths.
Sermon by Pastor Vlad Savchuk “What Type of Sex is OK in Marriage?” Please note that this is of mature content.
Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous. ~ Hebrews 13:4
Have you ever wondered what God says about sex inside of marriage and what is allowed and not allowed? Here Pastor Vlad Savchuk answers this question in the video above. He has had to counsel many couples on the subject matter and now brings the topic into the open, as it’s deemed a taboo topic within the church community and hardly ever discussed in the church or in the household, except for to abstain from sexual activity outside of marriage. Sometimes it has been deemed to be a dirty and sinful act, however sex is something that God created to be enjoyed within the marriage covenant and is a beautiful thing to help bond the relationship between a husband and wife. However, as we know what the Lord creates for good the enemy corrupts, clearly seen in the world today. In a day and age where anything goes, even within the church community, the world has polluted our minds, so it’s good to get clarification on what’s permissible and the liberties that one has within the marital covenant.
If the topic of sex is not discussed within the church community with the biblical truth, then our youth will seek the answers elsewhere and the enemy is always waiting in the wings to provide the information that will corrupt impressionable minds, as well as defile the temple of the holy spirit (i.e., our bodies). As the saying goes, “we cannot continue to send our children to Caesar for their education and be surprised when they come home as Romans.”
Transcript of the video “What Type of Sex is OK in Marriage?” by Pastor Vlad Savchuk:
The Marriage bed. What is allowed? What is not? What is okay to do?
Is it okay do this or is it okay to do that?
Warning! This video is not suitable for all audiences. This is going to be of mature content and please be careful who is listening to it, if you are watching this somewhere in the living room or in the house.
“Marriage bed undefiled” the Greek word here for undefiled is only used in this exact form four times in the New Testament and it means uncontaminated, and set apart. So, what is not okay? What is the defiling of the marriage bed? Let’s look at four things that I believe defile marriage bed.
Number one is adultery.
Now obviously, we know that it is sin. It’s wrong. Matthew 19:9, 1 Thessalonians 4:3-4, indicate that adultery is a sin. We see this in the ten commandments. Spouse swapping is also adultery. They have T.V. shows, they have practices today in our culture where adultery is portrayed as good. We are experimenting. We are trying something out something different, and the Bible still calls that adultery. So, adultery is definitely a no, no.
The second thing that’s not good, that’s not okay, and it’s a sin is threesomes.
Threesomes is when more than two people are engaged in sexual intercourse. And it’s done with permission or it’s done with consent. People are okay doing that. And some people say that hey, it’s completely fine as long as we’re are all on the same boat. Some people even use the Bible to say, “Well, look, Jacob had two sisters that he had sex with.” Well, not really. Yes, polygamy was permitted even though it was not God’s perfect will because Jesus from the beginning stated that divorce and polygamy and all this other stuff; it was not there from the beginning and therefore it’s not God’s will. but it was allowed for that time for the nation of Israel.
But Jacob was not sleeping with Rachael and Leah at the same time. There is not one instance. On the opposite, they would fight so that Jacob would go and sleep with Leah because he was planning to go and spend the night with Rachael. And so, we don’t see one indication or event hint that Jacob slept with both of the two sisters together. And that is wrong and that is not okay and the Bible condemns that.
The third thing is virtual adultery or we call it porn.
Bringing porn into your marriage, Pornography is going to destroy your marriage. I’ve known people who have wanted to spice up their sex life and they brought porn and both of them were I guess okay watching porn. Usually, one person is kind of hesitant, the other person is like super fired up in cases like these. Most of the marriages that I know who did that if they did not repent, their marriages fell apart.
You are inviting demons into your marriage and plus it’s so unfair for marriage to compare to pornography because pornography is acting, and it’s adult acting. It takes days to make a 40-minute porn video and most of those people are on drugs.
They are using drugs to get through this career that they are in. And afterwards a lot of them, they don’t do really well. It really takes a huge toll on their life. There is so much abuse that happens there. And if you watch the testimonies, and I’ve watched quite few testimonies who were in that industry, and they testify of how dark and how horrible that place is. And so, when you take out of that place, which is a place of drugs, which is a place of abuse, which is a place of unrealistic- that’s not even real and you bring that into your marriage bed thinking that’s all we need, very soon those spirits that are operating behind those people and that industry will come into your life through those films and they will destroy your marriage to the ground or your sexual life to the ground.
Number four is rape.
What’s not allowed. So, we’ve mentioned adultery, threesomes, watching porn, and rape. Colossians 3:19, I want to mention. So, the problem with rape and I had to deal with in my pastoral work I would say, or ministry where some spouses, men in particular feel like it’s not rape because of 1 Corinthians 7:1-5, my wife’s body belongs to me therefore I am entitled, therefore I can demand and I could force sex on my spouse. But– that’s first all, misquoting that Scripture and taking it out of context. Rape is all non-consensual sex within marriage or outside of it. Most people think rape is only outside of marriage. So, if I have non-consensual sex with somebody it’s rape but if I am married to this person, it’s not rape. They owe me. I’m just taking what’s mine. Are you? Is it yours or does that body belong to Jesus?
Are you simply claiming what’s yours or are you being a rapist? Rape is non-consensual sex even within marriage. Forcing it and demanding it is not what the Scripture in 1 Corinthians 7 is talking about. 1 Corinthians 7 is talking about giving satisfaction in sex. Serving the other person in sex. Not demanding and not forcing sex on your spouse. So, if you are using that verse to justify a forced or demanding or you are entitled kind of attitude towards sex as a man, you are misquoting the Bible and that’s not a character of Christ. Because in that verse it’s talking about serving your spouse not making them your slave.
Now what about what’s okay in the marriage bed?
So, we’ve mentioned some things that defile the marriage bed but now let’s look at some things that are honestly, sex Toys, Oral Sex, Different Positions is it okay or is it not okay? Things like oral sex, things like different positions sex toys. So here are concerning these things that I want to bring first of all like a basic framework of how each couple should decide whether oral sex, sex toys or different positions are allowed. Because there is really no one way or the other way in the Bible even though I know some people are very strong set on against oral sex or some people have said “Hey, it’s okay to have oral sex in marriage.” Some people are against sex toys and some people are like “Oh, it’s okay to have sex toys.”
And I’m going to touch on each of them in just a moment but here are the three questions you should ask before you can determine if this is okay for you or not.
The first question you should ask is if the Scripture condemns it. Is it prohibited in the Scripture? Because if it’s not you can assume it is permitted.
The second question that we have to ask is, is this beneficial? Is this harming me, or is this harmful or is this helpful? Now, I get these questions from Apostle Paul’s writings. Apostle Paul, 1 Corinthians 6:12 he says: So, the first questions is like is it lawful? Is the Bible against it? If the Bible is silent, okay, maybe it’s permitted.
Number two, is this harmful? Is this beneficial? Like is there physical harm to this activity or not? And is this going to bring your marriage together or you are going to separate after that? Like, you are going to drift apart.
And then third one, and this is the big one, this is the biggest deal breaker for any kind of topic that a lot of couples ask about concerning different sex acts or positions. Is the other spouse on board with it? Is there mutual consent? Is this spouse forced into what she’s not comfortable with? If that’s the case then it’s not okay. Even if the Bible is not against it even if you’re like, “Oh, there is no harm in this”, but the other spouse is not consenting to it the other spouse is not comfortable with it then it’s not okay for your marriage.
So, if you can’t deprive yourself from your spouse without consent, you need consent to explore each other in this particular way that you may have a question with your spouse’s permission and their consent. And if they are not comfortable, you can’t push it you can’t force it.
Now few thoughts on oral sex.
The Bible does not condemn oral sex within marriage. We don’t see strong condemnation against it. Outside of marriage, oral sex is still sex and it’s sin. And so, it’s never supposed to be used as an alternative to actually having intercourse for unmarried couples. Sometimes people are like, “Yeah, we are just messing around.”
No! You are committing fornication if you are having oral sex with your girlfriend or with your boyfriend. Period! Now within marriage oral sex is free from sin as long as there is mutual consent. In fact, some people go as far as to say that there are verses in the Bible that indicate or speak of oral sex in Song of Solomon. In Song of Solomon 2:3 where the fruit represents the male genitals and in Song of Solomon 4:16 where the garden throughout the Book of Song of Solomon is speaking or is used for vagina. And so, if you read those verses, you can get pretty much the implication that this is referring to oral sex. But again, each marriage bed is going to be different depending on what each person is comfortable with. When it comes to oral sex, I would really encourage because usually it’s the guys who are like, “Yeah, I want to do it. I want my wife to do it.” But are those desires fuelled and created because you watched pornography? Or they are just godly desires to explore your spouse in an intimate way?
And a lot of times in the area of marriage, one of the spouses feels very grossed out by this idea because of the abuse or because of the way they grew up where the idea of sex in marriage was very gross. I remember I heard a testimony of one guy, he was a prophet actually he’s still alive. I think he has like 17 kids and he claimed that he has never seen his wife naked. And they have 17 kids. I don’t know how they did it but they did it somehow.
And some of the religious upbringing have this very very strict idea on marriage bed where like, God is there watching or God is just leaving the room like come on, get it done with quickly. You know, move on with your life. But God created sex and He wants us to have joy and enjoy it and have pleasure and explore each other and get to know each other as long as it is done in a way that does not bring another person into that marriage bed whether virtually or physically. As long as you are not bringing fantasies also about somebody else onto your spouse and as long as there is consent to that. And so it will depend on each couple and it’s a liberty that each couple has to exercise. There is really no rule against or for it when it comes to oral sex.
Now sex toys.
And I reached out to our marriage ministry, kind of asked them of this also advice on this. I think that people don’t need sex toys in their marriage bed but I’m going to read something that they sent to me. It’s a conversation that they had with one person who said this: The same thing as can people masturbate outside of marriage? It’s something that is wrong, I believe. And so, I think that when it comes to this, when it comes to sex toy even though the Bible does not explicitly say anything against it or for it, I think that if it replaces your spouse or if you can no longer satisfy your spouse that you need a toy now, then you really are already kind of adding some foxes in your vineyard. And you should examine what is happening really in your heart and what’s happening with the quality of your marriage. Because sex is not really– it’s really like a revealer of what’s happening in your marriage. It’s not necessarily a deal breaker like where it makes your marriage, as much as it reveals if your marriage is doing good or is broken. So my stance on this I think that couples should abstain from it.
Anal sex.
I know that in our culture it’s portrayed now as it’s okay and it’s something that people push for and go for especially because of pornography that it’s being pushed in our culture. Now I want to mention something about that, what it’s not. Some people misuse the Scripture in the Old Testament to say that anal sex is bad because of those Scriptures. I think anal sex is bad and I don’t think you should practice it but not because of those Scriptures.
So let me read to you from Gotquestions.org, I honestly agree with that. And so, I think that it’s– you might not find a Scripture that it’s wrong but I do think it’s unhealthy, it’s not safe and I think the couple should abstain from it. And those ones who are really eager to experiment some of this little craziness should really maybe get delivered from pornography or effects of pornography because a lot of it is watching porn in your past that can affect and give you ideas and fantasies on how you should have or explore your spouse in your marriage.
Conclusion
The more your eyes are pure, the more your heart is pure the more the pleasure will be pure in your marriage. And you don’t need to do anything to add to it from the world or from the practices of adult stars or practice all of this kind of immorality.
I hope that this brought some clarity. I do know that this a very sensitive topic. If some of you are going to unsubscribe after this, it’s completely fine but I do know that not a lot of people are brave to mention or even talk about this. I was kind of hesitant about it. I asked my wife for permission and also had our marriage ministry to kind of go through my notes as well so that I could bring some clarity on this topic. There is a book I read after I got married called, “Sheet Music” by Kevin Leman. I think that what’s the book was about. It deals with sexual relationship from a medical point of view. He is a Christian guy. Even though I don’t agree on some things, but it also brought also a lot of clarity to me and we even recommend it to married couples. And so that’s something that I would leave as a resource to you.
God bless you. Thank you very much for watching this video.
—————-
***By Pastor Vladimir Savchuk of Hungrygen Church / Photo by Pexels
We must be careful of our words and how we use them, especially those who have spiritual authority: like a mother or father over a child, a husband over his wife or what we speak overselves; there is power in the tongue to bring life or death.
“Life and death are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” – Proverbs 18:21
What Does Life and Death In The Power Of The Tongue Mean?
It means that the words we speak have an incredible power to shape our lives and the lives of others. Our words can be used as a tool to bring life—by bringing encouragement, comfort, and hope—or to bring death—by spreading hurtful lies, gossip, and negativity. Every word we say carries with it a profound responsibility and a potential to make a difference.
In Matthew 12:37, Jesus said, “For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” This verse teaches us that the power of our tongue can have lasting consequences. We are ultimately responsible for the words we use and how they affect ourselves, as well as others.
Our words have the power to lift up or tear down—to bring life or death into a situation. We should always remember that we are accountable for our words and think carefully about how we use them. When we choose to speak life, rather than death, it has the power to bring light and hope into a situation—and can even bring about miraculous transformations.
In Ephesians 4:29, it says, “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” This verse encourages us to speak words that are edifying and full of life. In our conversations with others, we should strive to bring hope and joy rather than hurt and despair.
James 3:10 says, “From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so.” This verse warns us against saying one thing in one moment and then something completely different in another moment. Our words should always reflect integrity and thoughtfulness.
Our Words Can Bring Life or Death
Life and death are in the power of the tongue. That means we should take everything we say very seriously. Let’s look at specific ways to speak life and some of the ways we speak death.
We Speak Life By Encouraging Others
We can use our words to bring life by encouraging and uplifting those around us. We can choose to speak words of kindness that build up instead of tear down. Consider speaking truth in love and offering words of affirmation when we talk about others—including ourselves.
In Hebrews 10:24, it says, “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works.” This verse reminds us that our words have the power to bring encouragement and motivation into someone else’s life.
Our words have the power to bring about positive change, inspire others, and even heal broken relationships. We can use our words to make a difference in someone’s life—by offering them hope and comfort. For example, speaking words of affirmation can be especially powerful for someone who is struggling with low self-esteem or depression.
We Speak Death By Being Critical
One of the most common ways we speak death into the lives of others is by constantly being critical. We can use our words to tear down and discourage those around us. But when we do this, we are not using the power of our tongues for good.
In Proverbs 18:21 it says, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.” This verse reminds us that words have power—and whatever we speak can bring life or death into the lives of those around us.
Therefore, let us be careful with our words—that they may bring life and not death to those around us. May we choose to use our words for good and make a difference in someone’s life!
We Speak Life By Speaking The Truth
It’s also important to speak life by speaking the truth. This means avoiding manipulation, exaggeration, and fabrication with our words. It means saying what is true and helpful in a respectful manner—and not using our words to manipulate others or spread lies.
In Colossians 3:9-10 it says, “Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator.” We should always strive to use our words responsibly and respectfully—and never twist the truth or mislead others with our words.
By being mindful of the power of our words, we can choose to bring life into every situation. Life and death are in the power of the tongue—so let us use our words wisely, for the glory of God.
May we speak life into each other’s lives, and uplift one another through our words!
We Speak Death By Gossiping
Gossip and slander are another common way that we can speak death into the lives of others. We should never spread rumors or engage in gossip, as it has the power to ruin someone’s reputation and cause a lot of hurt.
In Proverbs 16:28 it says, “A perverse man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates the best of friends.” This verse reminds us that our words can be destructive and hurtful if we are not careful.
Gossip is not an innocent thing. Let us be mindful of what we say and not use our words to spread malicious lies or destructive rumors. May we choose instead to speak life into the lives of those around us, and never use our words for evil.
We Speak Life By Praying For Others
We should also use our words to speak life by praying for others. We can pray for those who need encouragement, healing, and hope in their lives. By being intentional with our prayers, we can bring joy and peace into someone else’s world.
In James 5:16 it says “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” This verse reminds us of the power of our prayers—and how they can bring about healing and restoration in the lives of others.
Really, there are few things better than praying for someone. When we pray we are asking God Himself to intervene in a person’s life. We’re asking the most powerful and loving being in the universe to do good to someone. Is there anything better than that?
We Speak Death By Complaining
We should be mindful of how our words affect those around us. We should avoid complaining or grumbling about people and situations, as it only brings negativity into the atmosphere. Additionally, complaining tends to spread. When you complain it tempts others to complain as well.
In Philippians 2:14-15 it says, “Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world.”
Our words can be a light to those around us—or they can be a source of darkness. Let us use our words wisely, and strive to speak life into every situation. We can use our words to bring joy and hope into the world, rather than negativity.
Speak Life By Using Words Of Blessing
Finally, we can use our words to speak life by speaking words of blessing over those around us. We can choose to use our words to bless instead of curse. This means choosing not to criticize or pass judgement, but rather offering grace and mercy through our speech.
In Numbers 6:24 it says, “The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you.” We can use this verse as a model for offering words of blessing in our lives.
When we speak words of blessing, we are using our words to bring life and joy into someone else’s world. We can bless people with our words, whether we are giving an encouraging word in a difficult time or simply speaking kind and gentle words. Let us choose to use our words to be a blessing!
Frequently Asked Questions
What does “life and death are in the power of the tongue” mean?
This phrase comes from Proverbs 18:21, which says “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.” This verse is referring to how powerful our words can be—in that they can bring death or life into a situation. Our words have the power to create positive or negative change in the world, depending on how we use them.
What does it mean to speak life?
To speak life means to use your words to encourage and lift up those around you. It means speaking words of blessing rather than criticism, and using our words as an instrument for good in the world. Using our words to speak life means being intentional about bringing joy and hope into someone else’s world.
What does the Bible say about speaking life?
The Bible is full of verses that encourage us to use our words wisely and speak life into every situation. In James 3:5-6 it says, “Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.” This is a powerful reminder of how important it is to use our words for good, rather than evil. Let us strive to be mindful of our words and speak life into every situation!
——————-
*** By Stephen Altrogge at The Blazing Center: theblazingcenter.com
The Sisterhood Hub 