Tag: love

Jesus Loved the Person, But Never Affirmed a Lie

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In a world increasingly shaped by feelings over truth, many have come to believe that love requires agreement—that to truly care for someone, you must affirm their identity, their choices, and even their errors. But that is not the pattern we see in Christ Jesus. The life and ministry of Jesus reveal something far deeper, far stronger, and far more liberating than mere affirmation: truth-filled love.

Jesus was undeniably compassionate. He drew near to the broken, the rejected, the outcast, and the sinner. He did not wait for people to clean themselves up before engaging them; He met them in their mess, in their confusion, and in their pain. Yet His compassion was never expressed through compromise. At no point did He affirm what was false in order to make someone feel comfortable. His love was not rooted in approval—it was rooted in redemption.

Love Does Not Compromise Truth

When Jesus declared,

“I am the way, the truth, and the life” (John 14:6)

He was not merely describing something He possessed—He was revealing who He is. Truth is not just something Jesus spoke; it is His very nature. Because of this, it would be impossible for Him to affirm a lie without denying Himself.

This is where modern thinking often collides with biblical reality. Today, love is often defined as unconditional affirmation—support without correction, acceptance without transformation. But the love of Christ is not passive; it is active and purposeful. It does not leave people where it finds them.

Jesus never said, “Remain as you are and be affirmed.” He said,

“Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.”

To follow Him is to be changed by Him.

Compassion Without Compromise

Throughout the Gospels, we see Jesus extending extraordinary grace to those society rejected. He touched lepers, dined with tax collectors, and spoke with those labeled as sinners. Yet in every interaction, there was a consistent thread: He loved them fully, but He never validated the sin that bound them.

When He encountered the woman caught in adultery, He did not join in her condemnation—but neither did He ignore her sin. His words were both merciful and direct:

“Go and sin no more.”

In that moment, we see the perfect union of grace and truth. Mercy did not cancel truth; it made transformation possible.

This reveals a critical distinction: Loving someone does not mean agreeing with everything about them. In fact, true love refuses to affirm what is destroying the person it cares for.

The Great Physician Speaks Truth

In Mark 2:17, Jesus says:

“Those who are well don’t need a doctor, but the sick do.”

This statement is not just descriptive—it is deeply revealing. Jesus identifies Himself as the Great Physician, one who comes to heal what is broken. But healing requires diagnosis, and diagnosis requires truth.

A doctor who ignores illness to protect a patient’s feelings is not loving—he is negligent. In the same way, Jesus never ignored sin. He exposed it, not to shame, but to heal. He named the condition so He could bring the cure.

Sin, left unaddressed, destroys. Jesus confronted it because He came to set people free.

Truth Is the Highest Form of Love

The world often promotes a version of love that avoids discomfort at all costs. It says:

“If it feels good, affirm it.” “If it offends, avoid it.”

But Jesus demonstrates that truth and love are inseparable.

To affirm a lie may provide temporary comfort, but it ultimately leads to deeper bondage. Truth, on the other hand, may challenge, convict, and even offend—but it leads to freedom.

Real love is not afraid to tell the truth. Real love does not prioritize feelings over eternal reality. Real love speaks in a way that calls people out of darkness and into light.

Jesus did not come to make people comfortable in their sin—He came to deliver them from it.

Let God Be True

Scripture declares in Romans 3:4:

“Let God be true, and every man a liar.”

This is a call to anchor ourselves in God’s truth above all else—above culture, above popular opinion, and even above our own emotions. Human understanding is limited and often flawed, but God’s Word stands unchanging.

If Jesus, who is the embodiment of truth, never affirmed a lie, then we must be careful not to do so in the name of love, tolerance, or acceptance. To elevate human perspective above divine truth is to lose our foundation entirely.

Our Call: Walk as He Walked

To follow Christ is to reflect His character. That means we are called to love as He loved—but also to stand in truth as He stood in truth.

This is not a call to harshness or self-righteousness. Jesus was never cruel in His honesty. His words were firm, but they were always aimed at restoration. Likewise, we are called to:

Approach people with humility

Extend grace generously

But never compromise truth

We meet people where they are—but we do not leave them there. We walk with them toward transformation.

Final Word

Jesus never sacrificed truth to gain acceptance.

He never affirmed sin to appear compassionate.

He never denied who He was—the Truth—to make others comfortable.

And if we are His followers, neither should we.

Because love that affirms a lie is not love at all—it is a subtle form of abandonment.

But truth, spoken in love, has the power to heal, restore, and set free. And that is the kind of love the world desperately needs.

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** Photo by Ian Panelo at Pexels

The Family of God: Beautiful and Diverse

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The Bible offers profound wisdom on love and humility, continually challenging believers to examine not only what we profess, but how we live. One of the most confronting statements is found in 1 John 4:20:

“Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen.”

These words expose the contradiction of claiming devotion to God while harbouring prejudice, partiality, or indifference toward others. They call us to a radical, transformative love—one that reshapes how we view, value, and treat every person.

This call becomes even more striking when we hold it alongside the Bible’s vision of God’s kingdom. In Revelation 7:9–10, John describes the culmination of history:

“After this I looked, and there before me was a great multitude that no one could count, from every nation, tribe, people and language, standing before the throne and before the Lamb… And they cried out in a loud voice: ‘Salvation belongs to our God, who sits on the throne, and to the Lamb.’”

This is the end toward which God is moving all things: a redeemed, unified, multiethnic family worshipping together in harmony. The diversity of the crowd is not erased—it is celebrated. Different nations, languages, cultures, and stories are woven into one glorious chorus of praise.

One in Christ, Not Divided by the World

Despite this clear biblical vision, divisions can still subtly appear—even within Christian communities. Scripture reminds us plainly in Galatians 3:28:

“There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.”

Yet even well-meaning believers can fall into patterns of valuing influence, wealth, race, age, or social standing. These distinctions can create barriers, foster inequality, and obscure the heart of the Gospel. God’s heart is for unity, not uniformity—unity rooted in love, humility, and shared identity in Christ.

God created us with different histories, cultures, languages, and perspectives, and each of us reflects His image in a unique way. When we love one another well across those differences, we reflect something of God’s own nature—Father, Son, and Spirit living in perfect unity and love. There is beauty in our differences, and that beauty is meant to draw us together, not push us apart.

Growing in Humble Love

The Bible calls us to be mindful when favouritism or division could subtly influence how we treat others. The Church—meant to be a refuge for the broken and a foretaste of heaven—can reflect God’s vision most clearly when all are welcomed and valued. Influence, image, or social standing can sometimes shape our perception, but God’s call is to unity, love, and humility.

James reminds us:

“Suppose a man comes into your meeting wearing a gold ring and fine clothes, and a poor man in filthy old clothes also comes in… have you not discriminated among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts?” (James 2:1–4)

This passage encourages careful reflection on how we respond to people in different circumstances. Jesus provides the perfect example: He welcomed the outcast, ate with those considered unworthy, defended the vulnerable, and showed compassion without regard for status or social value. Following Him, we are invited to see everyone as equally loved by God.

The only time we should look down on someone is when we are reaching out a hand to lift them up. This is the heart of true humility, captured in Philippians 2:3–4:

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.”

Christian love is not self-promoting; it is self-giving. It invites honest reflection on how we perceive and respond to others. It is revealed in recognising the homeless person as someone made in God’s image, in honouring those who cannot advance our status or serve our ambitions, and in living consistently with the belief that every person has infinite worth.

Humility also requires courage. Silence in the face of injustice, whether in the Church or the world, can unintentionally allow harm. As followers of Christ, we are called to stand with the poor, the abused, the marginalised, and the overlooked, ensuring that no one is treated as expendable or unworthy.

Living the Gospel Here and Now

The vision of Revelation is not something we merely wait for—it is something we are called to reflect now. Churches today can embody this picture of heaven by living in unity across ethnic, economic, generational, and cultural boundaries. When we pray, worship, read Scripture, and stand for justice together, we give the world a glimpse of God’s coming kingdom.

To love as Christ loved requires rejecting the world’s obsession with status and choosing instead the way of service. It means recognising that, in God’s family, there are no hierarchies—only brothers and sisters saved by grace.

Jesus said:

“By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” (John 13:35)

May we be known not for our divisions or our pursuit of influence, but for a radical love that breaks down barriers, uplifts the lowly, and reflects the heart of God. When we truly love those we can see, we reveal the love of the God we cannot see.

As James reminds us:

“Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.” (James 1:27)

True Christianity is not measured by status, platform, or power, but by love expressed through humility, justice, and service. Let us rise to this calling—not in our own strength, but through the Spirit of God, who empowers us to live as one beautiful, diverse, redeemed family in Christ.

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**Photo by Ann Tarezevich at Pexels / Photo The NIV Telos Bible

7 Firsts for Women in the Bible and Their Roles

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During the time of Jesus, women in society were often marginalized and excluded from positions of authority or prominence. In many cultures, their testimonies were not considered reliable in legal matters, and their roles were largely confined to domestic spaces. Social and religious norms discouraged interactions between men and women outside their families, further isolating them from the public and spiritual spheres.

Yet, Jesus stood in stark contrast to these norms. He consistently demonstrated love, respect, and trust for women, engaging them in ways that were revolutionary for His time. Not only did He elevate their status by including them in His ministry, but He also entrusted them with vital roles that shaped the course of salvation history.

Below, we explore seven significant “firsts” for women in the Bible, highlighting their profound contributions as witnesses and messengers of the Good News—and the timeless lessons they offer for stepping boldly into new beginnings.

1. The First Evangelist: The Samaritan Woman at the Well

At Jacob’s well, Jesus spoke with a Samaritan woman, breaking societal and gender barriers (John 4:1–26). In this encounter, He revealed Himself as the Messiah, and her heart was forever changed. She became the first evangelist in the New Testament, sharing the news with her town and inspiring many to believe. Her story reminds us that each new day carries the potential for transformation—one conversation, one courageous step, or one act of faith can spark a ripple effect that changes the lives of those around us.

2. The First Witness of the Resurrection: Mary Magdalene

Mary Magdalene was the first person to see the risen Jesus (John 20:11–18). She encountered Him at the empty tomb, initially mistaking Him for the gardener. When Jesus called her by name, she recognized Him, and He entrusted her with the message of His resurrection. Her story reminds us that no matter where we are starting from, we are called to witness and share life-changing truths. Every beginning, no matter how uncertain, holds the potential to inspire others.

3. The First to Anoint Jesus for His Burial: Mary of Bethany

Mary of Bethany anointed Jesus’ feet with costly perfume, a prophetic act of devotion (John 12:1–8; Mark 14:6, 9). Jesus affirmed that her gesture would be remembered wherever the Gospel is preached. Mary’s actions teach us that intentional acts of faith, love, and service mark new beginnings with purpose. Each day offers a chance to leave a meaningful impact through devotion and thoughtful action.

4. The First Woman Healed Publicly: Peter’s Mother-in-Law

Peter’s mother-in-law was healed from a fever by Jesus (Matthew 8:14–15). Immediately following her restoration, she served Him and others, demonstrating how healing and empowerment go hand in hand. Her example reminds us that each fresh start can be met with action. Transformation—whether physical, emotional, or spiritual—is meant to inspire us to serve and make a difference in the lives of others.

5. The First Financial Supporters of Jesus: Women of Means

Women such as Mary Magdalene, Joanna, and Susanna played a vital role in supporting Jesus’ ministry (Luke 8:1–3). Their generosity ensured His mission could continue, reflecting faith in action. Their story encourages us to invest our resources—time, energy, and talents—into things that advance God’s work. Every new beginning is an opportunity to give in ways that create lasting impact.

6. The First to Hear of His Birth: Mary, the Mother of Jesus

Mary, the mother of Jesus, was the first to hear the angel Gabriel’s announcement of His birth (Luke 1:26–38). Her immediate response, “I am the Lord’s servant,” reflects remarkable faith and willingness to embrace God’s plan. Mary’s courage teaches us that accepting God’s call requires trust, even when the future is unknown. Each new chapter in life is a chance to step forward in obedience and confidence, trusting that God’s plan unfolds perfectly.

7. The First Gentile Woman Praised for Her Faith: The Syrophoenician Woman

In Matthew 15:21–28, a Syrophoenician woman approached Jesus seeking healing for her daughter. Her persistence and unwavering faith impressed Him, and He praised her: “Woman, you have great faith!” Her story reminds us that persistence and boldness in faith open doors to new opportunities. Every beginning carries challenges, but perseverance and trust can lead to extraordinary outcomes.

Jesus’ interactions with women consistently challenged cultural norms, emphasizing their faith, courage, and indispensable role in His mission. From the Samaritan woman who became the first evangelist to Mary Magdalene, the first witness of the resurrection, women were central to the story of salvation. Their lives inspire all believers to embrace God’s call, step boldly into their purpose, and recognize the transformative impact of faith, service, and courage—no matter what new beginnings lie ahead.

These seven “firsts” in the Bible remind us that God values courage, faith, and devotion, often entrusting ordinary individuals with extraordinary roles. The women highlighted here embraced their callings with boldness, obedience, and trust, leaving a lasting impact on the story of salvation. Their lives inspire us to step confidently into new beginnings, to serve with purpose, and to trust that every act of faith—no matter how small—can shape the world around us. Just as these women became witnesses, messengers, and pillars of God’s plan, we too are invited to live boldly, embrace our calling, and make each new day an opportunity for transformation and hope.

Handling Disagreements in Marriage

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Key Quotes

“As the ‘head of the household,’ I believe the man should take it upon himself to lead by apologizing for his part first, even if he feels 99.9% of the blame is with his wife.”

” As I have often told newly wedded brothers, spiritual leadership is primarily comprised of being the first person in the relationship to die to yourself. “

“Seeking God individually first, examining my own heart (and asking Him to search my heart and reveal whether there’s any offense there), eagerly resolved to make right anything He reveals to me, is the more productive and fruitful path to restoring my earthly relationship than belaboring various viewpoints and tactics in a discussion.”

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Disagreements in human relationships are inevitable, even among those who are sincere believers. As Christians, we believe there are certain things which we should never even consider in times of difficulty. For example, when we are upset, we will never even consider killing our opponent. It’s laughable to even think that’s a possibility. In the same way, in marriage, we do not even consider divorce to be an option in resolving our disagreements. Divorce should be as unthinkable an option among spouses in marriage as murder is unthinkable among friends in an argument. 

In addition to knowing what not to do, it’s important to know what TO do in tough times. We should seek for tools to resolve our conflicts in a healthy, constructive manner. 

In my own marriage, remembering the following two things has helped tremendously:

I must be the first to die to myself 

There’s almost never a circumstance where the blame is 100% on one party alone. Both parties own some portion of the responsibility for any disagreement. As the “head of the household,” I believe the man should take it upon himself to lead by apologizing for his part first, even if he feels 99.9% of the blame is with his wife. (It’s incredibly unlikely that this felt proportion reflects reality)

One thing I have learned is that I must not apologize hoping to trigger reciprocity. My goal should not be to get my wife to “apologize back,” but rather to genuinely confess and own up to my responsibility. Sure, I may wish my wife would apologize, but that is a fleshly desire. I need to die to my will and my own desires, and seek instead to only be responsible for and concerned about my own shortcomings in the matter in question.  

There’s a lot of talk about the husband being a “spiritual leader” in the Christian world today. As I have often told newly wedded brothers, spiritual leadership is primarily comprised of being the first person in the relationship to die to yourself. There are all sorts of worldly ideas pervading Christendom about what it means for the man to be the head: about commanding respect, being obeyed, being the ruler of the home, etc. These are all wrong notions. To learn what true spiritual leadership is, we must look to Jesus Christ as our spiritual Head, and the Husband of His Church. Looking to our own Head and seeing how He spiritually led His Church, we see Jesus’s spiritual leadership defined by denying His own will every day, dying to Himself, looking to His Father, depending on the Holy Spirit, carrying His cross, and coming up underneath us in service and love. He never demanded respect, or forced obedience, but rather set the example of humble submission and obedience to the will of God the Father. 

This is what we as men in the home should do as well: set the example of humble submission to God as our spiritual act of leadership. 

Seek restoration of my relationship with God first

One picture that has really helped me think about resolving conflicts/ disagreements in my own marriage is that of the hands playing a piano. These hands can be compared to the husband and wife in a marriage. Think of when a player’s hands play beautifully. They are coordinated not through efforts of their own, time spent together in a kangaroo pocket, etc, but rather simply because they’re both perfectly connected to the player’s head. 

In marriage, I used to think we needed to have lots of long talks to “get on the same page,” etc, which really only amounted to the hands “spending more time together;” it never actually put us in tune! I mistakenly thought that unity was a function of coordination and communication, but more coordination and communication did not result in more unity; often, my own efforts only resulted in greater disunity. 

When I saw that if the hands aren’t coordinated, it means one of them must disconnected from the player’s head, it all made sense! Disconnection is paralysis, and we can’t expect a pianist with a paralyzed hand to play beautifully. Likewise, in marriage, we don’t need to spend more time together as paralyzed members; we need to seek to be restored to perfect connection with our Head! 

Seeking God individually first, examining my own heart (and asking Him to search my heart and reveal whether there’s any offense there), eagerly resolved to make right anything He reveals to me, is the more productive and fruitful path to restoring my earthly relationship than belaboring various viewpoints and tactics in a discussion. 

As we have done this, we have found many disagreements completely fade away entirely, needing no further discussion. When we do desire further conversation, we can engage fruitfully as members that have been restored to health as fully functioning, healthy hands.  Brother Zac Poonen has used the picture of the cross to describe all of our human relationships (the horizontal beam) in the context of our relationship with God (the longer vertical beam), and this picture is definitely true in marriage: no horizontal can thrive with a broken vertical; and almost all broken horizontals are really because of a broken vertical beam. 

God’s will for our marriages is that they would demonstrate the wonder of His redeeming love for us, reconciling us to perfect unity with Himself (Ephesians 5:31-32). These are a couple of ways in which we can personally seek to reflect His love in the disagreements that threaten to divide our marriages

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**By Jeremy Utley © Copyright – Jeremy Utley. No changes whatsoever are to be made to the content of the article without written permission from the author at NCCF Church / Photo by Studio 31 at Pexels

Speaking the Truth in Love in a World That Hates the Light

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In an age where feelings are exalted over facts and truth is treated like hate speech, speaking God’s Word can feel like standing alone in the storm. Yet Proverbs 1:7 (AMP) reminds us: “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise skillful and godly wisdom and instruction.” The wise welcome correction because it leads to growth. The foolish resist it because it confronts their comfort, pride, or sin. That resistance grows when people believe they are in control—smarter than God. Some mock His Word to justify rebellion, normalize sin, and persuade others that “everyone is doing it.” When the truth exposes their darkness, they often attack the messenger: “Why listen to that ‘foolish’ person? I’m more intelligent than them.” But Scripture cuts through the pride: “God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise… so that no one may boast before him.” (1 Corinthians 1:27–29)

They may become rude, dismissive, or even hostile—not because the truth is wrong, but because it demands change. And change requires humility, repentance, and letting go of false comfort.

Jesus explained the root of this rejection: “And this is the judgment: the light has come into the world, and people loved the darkness rather than the light because their deeds were evil.” (John 3:19) Darkness offers the illusion of safety. Many—even those who call themselves Christians—live with a cultural faith, not a transformed life. They may know church songs but not God’s Word, speak about Jesus but never obey Him, or share Bible verses online without living by them. When truth reveals this gap between appearance and reality, the reaction is often not repentance but hostility. Admitting the truth means admitting a lie has been lived. That’s painful. It shatters pride and forces people to confront uncomfortable realities about themselves and their choices.

Paul asked the Galatians, “Have I now become your enemy by telling you the truth?” (Galatians 4:16) Speaking truth will sometimes cost you relationships. When you reveal the difference between cultural Christianity and genuine faith, you become a threat. People do not want to hear that faith without obedience is dead (James 2:26), that repentance is essential (Luke 13:3), or that lukewarm faith is unacceptable to God (Revelation 3:16). It’s easier to discredit the messenger than to face the need for personal change.

Jesus warned His followers, “If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you.” (John 15:18) Paul also wrote, “Indeed, all who desire to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted.” (2 Timothy 3:12) Living in the light will not make you popular. You may lose friends, be misunderstood, or be ridiculed. You might feel left out, pushed aside, or treated like the problem. But God has not called us to be liked—He has called us to be faithful.

Still, even when it hurts, we must shine the light. Not everyone will reject it—some will be drawn to it, convicted of their sin, and transformed by God’s grace. You may not see the change immediately, but your obedience plants seeds God can water later. Jesus said, “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden.” (Matthew 5:14) When you face rejection, remember that it is not truly you they reject—it is God. Your task is obedience; the results are His.

So let your light shine. Do not let fear, pride, or the enemy blow it out. Even if speaking the truth costs you everything, remember the words of the old song: “This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine…” Keep shining, because the light you carry is not your own—it is the Light of Christ. And no matter how loud the darkness shouts, His light will outshine every shadow.

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*** Photo by Jan Kopřiva at Pexels